Chapter
BAH HUMBUG!
With COVID cases on the rise and a new threat of lockdown, it’s been a week of uncertainty, which is never great, never mind that it’s nearly Christmas. I’ve been fully expecting tonight to be cancelled, so now it’s finally upon us and it coincides with my last day working for two weeks, I’m feeling fully festive.
Greenfield Crescent / The Calthorpe Estate / Edgbaston Village
Our taxi drops us off at the pedestrianised section of Greenfield Crescent in the heart of ‘Edgbaston Village’. It’s one of Birmingham’s easiest on the eye roads, oozing Victoriana and with a string of lights zig-zagging the street as far as the eye can see, it’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas.
Chapter / Bar Area
Occupying both sides of a double fronted, semi-detached former bourgeois residence, Chapter still manages to feel Tardis-like. Its open kitchen overlooks a smart and cavernous bar area that’s been entirely stripped of its Victorian heritage. Beyond that sits the L-shaped, spot lit dining room that’s mostly picture-free; it looks comfortable but lacks charm, in much the same way VIP airport lounges do. Never mind, we’re out and it’s nearly Christmas.
Chapter / Dining Room
We’re asked if we’d like bread but decline and opt for sparkling over still water. A few minutes later bread arrives and our glasses are being filled with room temperature tap water. It’s nearly Christmas so we let it pass, but ask for ice, which never arrives.
We all settle in with G & Ts and focus on the menu. Three of us order the Mackerel Caesar starter and fifteen minutes later the waiter returns with menus as they’ve run out of the mackerel. Never mind, it’s nearly Christmas.
Pork Cheek—Raisin ketchup / Kohlrabi / Pak choi
Four nuggets of braised pork cheek are ‘melt-in-your-mouth’ as proclaimed by our waiter, with bite provided by pak choi and shavings of raw kohlrabi. It’s all held together by a rich gravy, although it’s trounced by a cloying raisin ketchup that swamps the entire palate. It doesn’t need more sweetness; it needs acidity, just replacing the raisin ketchup with something like a tart apple sauce would give this dish a fighting chance.
Across the table, there’s similar disappointment with the beetroot starter, with Paula suggesting it’s missing a dressing to bring it altogether, remarking it’s not even in the same ballpark as the beetroot salad at Otto.
Scallops—Apple / Hazelnut / Herbs
Will’s scallops are just the right side of overdone but still a hit, with a seared crust, intensifying their sweetness and crunch coming from fresh apple julienne and chopped walnuts. The whole thing is perfectly balanced with apple sauce… oh, hang on!
Off the Day Boat – Halibut—Artichokes / Local Greens / Anchovy
My ‘day boat’ halibut is under a stack of artichoke crisps, presumably to hide its shame as it’s so overcooked its crust has genuine crunch. There’s white anchovy and crispy kale, but it’s all dominated by Jerusalem artichokes three ways; crisped, pureed and boiled. Whilst, there’s plenty of variation of textures, it’s too homogenous when it comes to flavour.
Cod—Sweet Potato / Dahl / Yoghurt / Cracker
Will and Paula have both had the cod that sits on top of a mild curry of sweet potato and lentil, with flakes of cracker and raita. Paula says is OK; Will declares it underwhelming. It certainly doesn’t do much for the eyes.
Venison —Celeriac / Sprouts / Cranberry / Seeds
Katrina’s gone with the dish that ‘sounds Christmassy’ with beautifully pink venison, celeriac puree, perfect on the bite sprouts, sweet and tart cranberry, a rich gravy and crunch from seeds and it fully delivers on its Yuletide promise.
We’ve had sides of cheesy potato and honey roasted carrots that both do exactly what they say on the tin, but all in all it’s been mostly disappointing. I wouldn’t normally need the excuse that it’s nearly Christmas to have dessert but given what’s gone before, we all pass on the opportunity.
It’s still quite early so we settle the bill of £244 plus tip—including a bottle of Carmenere and a bottle of Riesling—and head over the road to Loki. There’s talk of ordering a cheese board too… after all it’s nearly Christmas.
5/10
5-6 Greenfield Crescent, Edgbaston, Birmingham B15 3BE
